Want to increase business

Damnit, I'm on a roll tonight.

Are you looking to increase revenue and business at your pharmacy. I have a fool-proof, sure fire way to do so.

Let me ask you one question. Ever notice how business picks up to furious pace once YOUR lunch starts. This only goes for those of you (99% of pharmacists) that get to work through their lunch. Once you pop that sandwich out of the bag, or rip the seal open on that frozen burrito, it becomes a madhouse at your pharmacy.

If you are on the verge of forclosure, I highly recommend you order out. Get something highly delicious, incredibly savory, and hot. It must be warm. By the time your back in the black, your meal will be room temperature. Its a promise.

Take a sip of your soda, the phone will ring. Take a big bite of a peanut butter sandwich, a customer will pop up out of nowhere. You get the idea.

Sometimes its fun to dick with the phone. Just put the piece of food by your mouth; don't actually start eating it. It will ring, but no one will be on the other end. You:1, Phone: 0. You get the idea.

Anyways, the point is, there is a secret underground community of food servers and your patients. They are watching you all the time and know when you are hungry. They wait for you to go heat up your lunch, and then they storm the store.

I have yet to enjoy one lunch uninterrupted since I've been working. Fuck that. I swear to God its going to make me kill someone.